Still going

Well, I got some good sleep last night.  I did however wake up at three in the morning, but it wasn’t due to a racing heart and a nasty hangover.  It was because my dog jumped out of bed and started circling around my desk.  A sure sign that a dump was about to be taken in the house.

I jumped out of bed and rushed her outside just in time.

She’s been having some tummy trouble off an on lately, this batch was a bit soft but not runny like it had been last month.  I chalked it up to stress as she had to spend all day yesterday at my father in laws and he has a very large dog that frightens her a bit.  They don’t interact because she is in her crate inside and he is in his pen outside, but is bark makes her go a bit crazy.  She appears to be better today.  

*knocks wood*

Anyway, I was able to get back in bed after and drift off fairly easily.  Had I been boozing the night before there would have been no more sleep for me this morning.  It would have been a circle of shame and haunting thoughts.  I can’t tell you how happy I am to not have that in my mornings this week.
Work was pretty smooth again.  I have to say that I never really realized how much the drinking impacted me the next day.  I mean, I knew I was “hungover” as in dehydrated and sluggish, but since it was something that happened on the daily, I think I just got used to it and decided I never really felt “that bad”.

These last couple of days has taught me what a lie that was.  You never realize how bad you feel until you actually feel good.  It’s been so very nice to not be counting down the hours … no, minutes until I could go home and get a drink in me to make me feel better.

Tonight I had one of my allotted two glasses of wine that I am allowing myself each night this week.  Hubs made dinner while I sipped and helped out and we chatted.  It was nice and I don’t think the wine was even needed.  It’s not like I catch a buzz or anything, and I’m learning that I should be okay next week with nothing but mocktails.

As soon as I’m done typing this I’m going to get my nightly cup of tea and my two tea biscuits and settle into bed to play on my phone to relax a bit before bed.  I’ve quite enjoyed that every night this week, but I knew I would.  That is something that I always “forget” when I want to drink, but I so love laying lazily in bed mindlessly scrolling or reading until I’m sleepy and going to bed.

Tomorrow is Friday and while I don’t have intention of drinking other than my two small glasses of wine, we shall see how it plays out.

I’m hoping to write more in depth this weekend about what sort of helped trigger me to try to stop again this time, but right now I need to be under the covers with my doggies.