Tomorrow.

Tomorrow is the day I decided I wanted to at least try a week sober.

I'm not going to lie, I'm already forming excuses in my mind as to why I need to not.

They are the lamest excuses of course, but they are forming.

I'm not ready.

I will still have Vodka in the cupboard (I just now noticed how I capitalize Vodka, hmm...).

I didn't get to day drink today like normal on a weekend because we had such a lovely time at the toddler's birthday party that we actually stayed instead of splitting after the normally acceptable hour.

I have to cook/meal prep tomorrow for the rest of the week and I clearly cannot do that sober.

I'm not ready.

What if it is such a nice day and I just want to day drink?

I'm pretty sure I'm going to be in a bad mood (REALLY??)

I might want to paint my nails and I'm not sure I've ever done that sober.

I'm not ready.

What if I want to ...? (this list is endless and the reasons don't even make sense!

I got a lovely comment today from msnewleaf (I'm not savvy enough to tag her) today that gave me pause from all of that:

 "I am looking forward to reading about your Day 1 tomorrow. You can do it! It is NOT easy, but there are so many of us doing the same thing, and we can all support each other. The more I read about others’ experiences after they have had some significant time sober, the more I want what they have. It seems to take at least 3 or 4 to 6 months to really start to get good and then just gets better after that. I don’t know this from personal experience yet, but I’m determined to get there! You should come, too."

You should come, too.
That touched me.
I'm one of those FOMO ppl that never want to go anywhere but always want to be invited. As a result of never showing up anywhere I no longer get invited any longer. I'm totally fine with is because I never wanted to go in the first place, but the fact that I wasn't invited hurts me. I realize this is totally stupid on my part and makes not sense but neither does most of my life so there. XD
This is an invitation I think I could get behind...I know I'm only shooting for one week right now, but the thought of my life getting so much better after putting in a few months of work sounds amazing. Like, SOOOOOOOO inviting.
I want that.

I just finally confessed to my hubby that I am going to try to do tomorrow and possibly next week sober. He is is usual supportive helpful self.
"Tell me if I need to hide the booze."
"Let me know how I can help."
"Do you need me to do anything?"
He's amazing...but he has been through this before...SO many times. He expects nothing from me because of my history and he doesn't want to be disappointed yet again. That should speak volumes to me.

Okay, I need to come back and read this tomorrow when I'm wavering. It tells me everything I need to know.